we always have choices to escape but in spite of these options, we still remain to be trapped and just stay.
i was some kind of hyper-perky yesterday as a result of a major puyatan with an idol; and that puyat was a big help. when you know someone would listen to your frustrations and when times that you also need to listen to other people's stories, you'll realize that there's no reason to hide your fears. you can cry and laugh that will mold you as an authentic human being.
i went to baclaran after work. it's been two months since the last time i went to that place wherein i was present for like twice in a week in six months -- for a release. i missed the church's dim lights, people crying for their petitions which is making me a bit sad and fulfilled.
i wanted to close the night crying but i just can't do it. maybe i should try acting lessons, workshop on releasing pail of tears etc. i don't know if my loneliness is self inflicted. now i'm wondering maybe happiness' sequel is loneliness on a higher amplitude.