and it already started

things may have started rough due to the uncontrollable irresponsibility of our accounting department but the week is gonna end with a smile on my face.

what a way to start this blog entry and to start 2009.

oh well, i took a day off from work last monday to attend to my graduate school enrollment and orientation. a bit excited that i am, i went to the nearest atm to check the salary that we are supposed to have on that day...and also to prepare on the fees that i should pay. guess what happened next? the only money available on that account was the Php2000 i saved from the holidays.

i rushed to a payphone then called a friend at work to check whether that particular wage is already credited to our accounts. she immediately called our accounting office to ask then i had that ultimate frustrated feeling that she was advised that it's gonna be availabe on wednesday. are we supposed to suffer from that long vacation and are they responsible enough not to think that we have have bills to settle?! its worst than having entered three wrong pins at the same time and had your card captured in the atm machine.

good thing that there are friends who are willing to lend their atm cards and that saved me from a possible late enrollment that will entail extra fees and extra day away from work. it also reconstructed my ruined day at least. thanks k. :)

so i tried not to devote hate to our accouting department. it's not gonna give me extra salary naman. :)

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last wednesday was my first day at school as a graduate student. i can say that grad school is way far cuter than college. the discussions are more interesting, classmates are more interesting too.
this time i should take schooling seriously. i can now feel the pain of paying my own tuition fee even with a 50% slash on it. the requirements are also tedious as having like 3 undergraduate courses' requirements only for one grad subject. but it's still cute.

i don't regret having sociology for a bachelor's degree but i should have taken marketing electives in college. should have saved one extra term instead.

american idol ramiele malubay's random visit

One random Sunday evening, she dropped by to inquire at The Picture Company MOA. It was a starstruck moment considering that I've been an American Idol viewer since its third season.Haha Nakakatawang experience. Crazy. Sabi ilabas ko daw yung SLR. Nilabas ko naman nanginginig pa.Hahaha

If you're not familiar with her, she's one of last season's AI contestant (with David Archuleta and David Cook as her batchmates). Eliminaed ata sya nung asa top9. :)

stuck on moving on

i had myself believe again in loving or reciprocity like 7 months ago but it was a terrible decision i guess. everybody's like stepping into the bandwagon of having themselves find a new person to share their time with and i am stupid enough to classify my own version of love as an obsession.

this should be written some three months back from now so this entry should be posted last september but i just don't find time to gather everything into a coherent blog entry.

i hate it when somebody's not courageous enough to tell something that he/she'd like to say; whether that word or whatever action could hurt the feelings of that person who's recipient (i cant think of word to use so i used recipient instead) of that rejection or whatever. i hate it when people say that things are better kept unsaid but it should be part of this reality that a person can't improve himself/herself unless he/she is advised on what areas to work on. it can be synonymous or analogous to a person who's on a job search that unless he/she is given an instruction that if he/she haven't receive any call from that employer within a span of one week let's say, then that application is assumed to be unsuccesful.

anybody who's capable of loving is also capable of hurting somebody. anybody who's willing to enter into a relationship should also be opening himself/herself into the possibilities of heartbreak and/or. i am not telling this because i can fall on either any of these two categories but...(things should end up with ifs and buts).

four months have passed but i'm still not courageous enough to move on. i am still this stupid who's expecting a text message for an invite. still expecting for a third time to rework on some things that have not actually ended. wishing that green archer could be flexible enough to be a cupid.

on frames

i had my glasses on when i was third year high school until my 1st sem in college. i didn't stop wearing it because my eye problem was already corrected instead it was broken and i was too shy to tell my mom that i needed a replacement after only 2 months of wearing it. the eye defect or whatever you call it isn't so serious so i thought of not replacing it [until last week].haha anlabo pero my eyesight was better now compared to before.

i love how this new glasses fits to my face. a bit of geeky but not so serious either. so here's how i look with this new glasses and 18 pounds weight loss. i'm only 146 pounds now! seriously!

first

I'm already one year at blogspot but I've only posted around 30 entries. Maybe i was just too happy to write something on this space or i'm just too shy to write what i should have written. Or I'm just innately lazy.

Btw, If I'm gonna write about happy things, then it would just forfeit the purpose of this blog. This is only a tool to release my frustrations and discontentment about life and its purpose. :)

[re]cycle

i've been into a cycle of denying my feelings for the last days. i've been trying to justify that things are happening because i screwed up with words and my actions do not speak for itself. the issues that have been haunting for over a month are still the same old issues that haven't been resolved untiil now. if i'm gonna make a summary of what have i been thinking lately, it will just give me a slap to my face that i haven't completely recovered from frustration brought by extremely expecting for something which is in fact giving me a minute possibility of moving on.

i dont know if this a repeat. this is like giving me a difficult time to process my thoughts. i am having a great time with work and the team i'm working with but i just feel so incomplete and directionless. late night bonding with friends are still not enough. i am still this lonely boy that i was when i decided to create an account here at blogspot. this is not emo though. maybe this is just a release.

blue-colored door

On why I changed URL will just be a part of the past.
I'm opening myself to new possibilities for the month of September. A bit risky but I guess this will be the start of something new. Something blue but not blue-lonely. Blue as a new color perhaps. I hope new doors are gonna open and the number thirteen will still be a lucky number.

photo by: Karla P!
location: San Agustin Museum, Intramuros, Manila
date: 08.08.08